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Listening to: From the Choirgirl Hotel. Not for long, though... it's not really matching my mood quite like I was expecting it too.

Currently Reading: Just barely started Jonathan Lethem's Gun, With Occasional Music. Kind of saving it for the train, as well as a stack of others (both fiction and non). Also, I recently read Laurie Notaro's I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies): True Tales of a Loudmouth Girl (again) in like two days, and peed myself laughing. Highly recommended. I also devoured The Broke Diaries by Angela Nissel in, like, a mere few days. Laughed until I peed. Also highly recommended.

Wishing: income. Lots of it. Other than that, life's pretty good.

I couldn't be more The current mood of ronkc@diaryland.com at www.imood.com right now.

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18 June 2002 | 8:30 PM

Phobia

Okay.

You know what freaks me out?

Cows.

Cows really really freak me out.

All livestock used to freak me out, but I grew to admire horses after Abigail�s horse shows, and sheep are portrayed so lovingly in the media these days. And llamas? Any animal with enough attitude and self-entitlement to spit is okay in my book. But cows? No. Cows plum freak me out.

Why, you may ask, of all freaky livestock do I find cows so disturbing? I�ll tell you. I�ll tell you right now.

You can come upon any number of cattle (either one or a field-full (herd?)) and as long as you�re standing there, they will look at you. It�s not like a happy-to-see-you kind of look, or like a WOAH! HUMAN! kind of look, or even like a �meh� kind of a look. No. It�s a sort of nonchalant, smug, haughty, �I know something you don�t know� kind of look. WHAT IS THAT?! WHAT DO THEY KNOW? IS IT IMPORTANT TO KNOW WHAT THEY KNOW? HOW DO I FIND THIS OUT? WHAT SECRET DO THEY HAVE?!

Okay. And then they chew. They just chew. WHAT IS THAT?! Now, I understand that they have four stomachs and everything like that, but (a) why backtrack during the digestive process? Why not just chew it all to begin with? And (b) why do they have to chew ALL THE FUCKING TIME?

So the chewing and the staring and the knowing. I just can�t deal with it.

I like burgers, though. Burgers don�t freak me out.

So I�m trying to grow out my hair, but I�m in that awkward middle stage. It sucks. I wish there were some sort of conditioner that would fix it, make it grow to exactly where you want it to grow, and then RINSE IT!! Wouldn�t that be magnificent? Look at me, writing these things like children aren�t starving all over the world.

Fucking cows.

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