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Listening to: From the Choirgirl Hotel. Not for long, though... it's not really matching my mood quite like I was expecting it too.

Currently Reading: Just barely started Jonathan Lethem's Gun, With Occasional Music. Kind of saving it for the train, as well as a stack of others (both fiction and non). Also, I recently read Laurie Notaro's I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies): True Tales of a Loudmouth Girl (again) in like two days, and peed myself laughing. Highly recommended. I also devoured The Broke Diaries by Angela Nissel in, like, a mere few days. Laughed until I peed. Also highly recommended.

Wishing: income. Lots of it. Other than that, life's pretty good.

I couldn't be more The current mood of ronkc@diaryland.com at www.imood.com right now.

Buy "Civilised Conversation..." Merchandise! Please? All the cool kids are doing it....

Please help me pay for college by purchasing items from Amazon.com through this link!!

Do you love me?

18 October 2001 | 11:53 PM

Happy Birthday, Me!

Okay!

Today was my birthday. Usually, birthdays freak me out, because unusually traumatic things happen on my birthdays. One year, we were playing "Kick the Can," and because it was my birthday, I got to be "it." In running for the can to kick, I tripped over a log, scraping quite a bit of exposed skin. The day before I turned seven, there was an Earthquake. One year, when I wasn't too keen on red meat or big gatherings, and I had a zit on my face, we ended up having a huge celebration at a local steakhouse. Last year, there was a midterm the day after my birthday, so I was busy studying East Asian History.

Additionally, the coupling of Social Anxiety Disorder with not knowing what do to with one's hands while being serenaded with that terribly monotonous birthday song was far too much for me.

Today was different, though.

In addition to some really nice emails and guestbook entires, I actually got a lot of chores done this morning! Theology class was interesting! I got a smoothie at the newly opened Jamba Juice! I went to KFC (Kentucky Fried Children) with Candy! I got to attend Lunafest, a film festival by, for, and about women, whose proceeds went to The Breast Cancer Fund!

When we got back to the dorms, we had cake. Apparently, Mom ordered a cake from a local bakery for delivery, then e-mailed Jamie, asking her to harbor the cake until a whole bunch of friends and I could enjoy it! Isn't that sweet!! They're all too good to me.

It was funny, though, because it was also Netta's birthday, and the bakery Mom used is owned by a man who is an enemy of Netta's family. Oh, well.

I know that this is probably the exhaustion and the diabetic coma talking, but I was reflecting this evening, and I think I've come a long way from where I was a year ago. I think I've really matured. I think I've really learned a lot, about life, about others, about myself. I've really grown, on the inside, and around the waist. I've grown as a friend, as a student, as a person, spiritually, intellectually, psychologically... I think I have really grown a lot in the past year. I'm really satisfied with the progress I feel I have made. Yay! Jubilate!

So if you're reading, (and I think we both know that you are,) please, be happy for me. Smile. I wasn't sure I would ever achieve any feeling like this. Imagine yourself on a cold rainy day, in front of a fire, enjoying a white chocolate mocha, reading a good book in really comfortable clothes. Now you finish your book, you finish your mocha, and you curl up in bed, warm, and under your favorite blanket. You are warm, comfortable, happy. That's how I feel right now. That's how I wish everyone could feel for at least a few minutes of his or her life.

So I'm going to brush my teeth and change into something comfortable, and go to bed, and make it so.

Special Birthday Smile:

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